Don't ask someone to remember you when an opportunity comes along. Give them reasons to remember you before one does.
You've probably said it.
I know I've heard it countless times during my career.
Maybe you've just finished a conversation with someone working in college athletics. Perhaps they reviewed your resume, answered questions about the profession or spent 20 minutes talking with you about your career.
The conversation is wrapping up.
Then comes the line:
"If you hear of anything, please keep me in mind."
There's nothing necessarily wrong with saying it.
But there's a problem if that's your career strategy.
You're putting the responsibility for what happens next on someone else.
You met them.
You told them what you're looking for.
Now you're hoping they'll remember you when an opportunity appears.
What are you going to do to make sure they do?
Being Connected Isn't the Same as Being Remembered
In my last post, "You Don't Need More Connections. You Need Better Conversations," I wrote about something I've been seeing more frequently while talking with students, recent graduates and young professionals.
We tell people they need to network.
So they do.
They build their LinkedIn networks.
They attend conventions.
They introduce themselves.
They schedule informational conversations.
Those are good things.
But making the connection is only the beginning.
The next challenge is staying connected without turning every interaction into:
"Do you know of any jobs?"
That's where networking starts becoming relationship building.
And there's a big difference between the two.
Meet → Ask → Wait
Here's the networking strategy I want young professionals to stop using:
Meet → Ask → Wait
You meet someone.
You tell them you're looking for an opportunity.
You ask them to keep you in mind.
Then you wait.
Maybe they remember you.
Maybe they don't.
Think about what you're asking.
Someone may know hundreds — perhaps thousands — of people throughout their career.
They're managing their own job.
Their own staff.
Their own deadlines.
Their own family.
Their own professional relationships.
And now we're expecting them to remember that six months ago we mentioned that we'd really like to work in sports communications?
That's asking a lot.
There's a better approach.
Meet → Learn → Act → Follow Up → Add Value → Stay Connected
This takes more work.
That's exactly why it works.
1. Meet
Start the relationship.
Introduce yourself.
But don't approach someone because you've already figured out what they can do for you.
Get to know them.
Learn about their career.
Understand what they do.
Start with curiosity.
2. Learn
This is where the better conversation matters.
Ask thoughtful questions.
Listen.
If someone has spent 10, 20 or 30 years working in the profession you're trying to enter, don't spend the entire conversation telling them about yourself.
Learn something.
Ask what they wish they knew when they started.
Ask what skills they see becoming more important.
Ask what separates strong candidates from everyone else.
Ask about mistakes they've made.
Then listen.
3. Act
This may be the most important step.
Do something with what you learned.
If someone tells you that your writing needs improvement, write more.
If they tell you your portfolio needs work, improve it.
If they recommend learning statistics software, start learning it.
If they suggest reaching out to someone, make the introduction.
Advice without action doesn't change anything.
And here's something else I've learned:
People remember when you actually use their advice.
4. Follow Up
Imagine receiving this message a month after talking with someone:
"When we talked, you suggested that I strengthen my portfolio by showing more variety in my work. I took your advice and added several new writing and social media examples. Thank you again for pointing me in that direction."
Notice what's missing.
There's no request for a job.
There's no:
"Have you heard of anything?"
You're simply showing the person that their time mattered.
You listened.
You acted.
You're getting better.
That's how you begin becoming memorable.
5. Add Value
This is the part of networking we don't discuss enough.
You don't have to be 20 years into your career before you can help someone.
Maybe you see an article connected to something you discussed.
Send it.
Maybe they receive an award.
Congratulate them.
Maybe their school accomplishes something significant.
Acknowledge it.
Maybe they post something on LinkedIn that makes you think.
Join the conversation with a thoughtful response.
Adding value doesn't have to mean doing something enormous.
Sometimes it simply means demonstrating that the relationship isn't entirely about what you can get from the other person.
6. Stay Connected
This is where relationships are built.
Not every week.
Not with a scheduled:
"Hey, just checking in."
And certainly not every time you see a job opening.
Stay connected naturally.
Let people see your progress.
Celebrate theirs.
Ask questions when you genuinely have one.
Share what you're learning.
And occasionally reach out simply because you haven't talked in a while.
That's different from maintaining a relationship only because you think someone might eventually help you get hired.
Give People a Reason to Remember You
Here's the shift I want young professionals to make:
Stop asking people to keep you in mind.
Instead:
Give them reasons to remember you.
Become the person who follows through.
Become the person who takes advice and does something with it.
Become the person who asks good questions.
Become the person who improves.
Become the person who shows appreciation.
Become the person who helps others.
Become the person who stays connected before needing something.
Then something interesting happens.
When an opportunity does appear, someone doesn't have to search their memory trying to remember who you are.
They already know.
Your Resume Can't Do This For You
This is also why I don't believe career development can simply be about creating a better resume.
You absolutely need a strong resume.
But your resume can't build relationships for you.
It can't ask thoughtful questions.
It can't follow up.
It can't demonstrate curiosity.
It can't thank someone.
It can't show someone six months of professional growth.
And it certainly can't build your reputation.
Your resume tells people what you've done.
Your relationships help people understand who you are.
You need both.
The Five-Minute Follow-Up Test
Here's something practical you can do today.
Open LinkedIn.
Look at the people you've had meaningful career conversations with during the last year.
Pick three.
Then ask yourself:
When was the last time I talked with them?
More importantly:
What have I done since our conversation?
If someone gave you advice and you acted on it, tell them.
Don't ask for anything.
Don't send your resume.
Don't ask whether they know of openings.
Simply say thank you and tell them what happened because you listened.
Five minutes.
One message.
One relationship strengthened.
Career Development Requires Ownership
There's a larger lesson underneath all of this.
Nobody will care about your career more than you do.
Mentors can guide you.
Professors can teach you.
Supervisors can challenge you.
Friends can encourage you.
Connections can introduce you.
But eventually you have to do something.
That's why I've become increasingly interested in the space between career advice and career action.
Young professionals have access to more advice than perhaps any generation before them.
The information isn't necessarily the problem.
The harder part is creating a process for using it.
How do we help someone make the connection?
Have the conversation?
Identify what needs improvement?
Take action?
Follow up?
And continue building the relationship?
Those are questions I've been thinking about quite a bit lately.
I'm working on something designed to help young professionals connect, communicate and collaborate while taking greater ownership of their careers.
I'm not quite ready to share all of it yet.
But we're getting closer.
For now, here's my challenge:
Don't ask someone to keep you in mind this week.
Give someone a reason to remember you.
Stay Connected.
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